Here are some diffs, with comments interspersed.
*** Linux-2.2.DRAFT7.txt.orig Thu Jan 21 14:09:56 1999
--- Linux-2.2.DRAFT7.txt Thu Jan 21 14:20:28 1999
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> There were two problems in the first paragraph. First, 2.2 is not
> a "major version"; a "major version" means you increment the first
> digit (e.g. 3.0). Anyway, it's better to use the same word to mean
> same thing, in this case "update". Otherwise people have to figure
> out that the "major version" and the "update" are not two different
> things being announced. Also, the second sentence has become
> totally meaningless (What is an "advanced collection"? Do people
> really want "low-level features"?), so I have replaced it with
> something meaningful. Thus:
***************
*** 11,14 ****
Today Linus Torvalds, the main developer and coordinator of the Linux kernel
! team, released a major new version of the Linux kernel. This update brings
! advanced collection of low-level features.
--- 11,14 ----
Today Linus Torvalds, the main developer and coordinator of the Linux kernel
! team, released a major update to the Linux kernel. This update brings
! substantial performance improvements and a multitude of new features.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> The biggest remaining problem I see is with the "bullet list" of highlights.
> Grammatically, it needs to have parallel form -- either all sentences,
> or all sentence fragments. The diffs below change the few remaining
> sentence fragments to sentences, and (I believe) tighten up the
> presentation a bit as well. (They also correct a few typos.):
***************
*** 16,18 ****
! * Advanced network routing and WAN support, which gives Linux the ability to
replace many expensive, proprietary network devices. Users can take control of
--- 16,18 ----
! * Advanced network routing and WAN support gives Linux the ability to
replace many expensive, proprietary network devices. Users can take control of
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> Incidentally, re: the above... what is this about 256-bit encryption?
> Does that mean 128-bit is passe'? Is it limited to 256 bits?
> Most readers won't know whether 256 means it's better than others'.
> Maybe "military-grade" or "unbreakable" would be better here:
> "Military-grade encryption is freely available as an add-on component."
***************
*** 23,35 ****
* A tradition of Y2K readiness positions Linux 2.2 as an international
! operating system ready for the new millennium and Linux 2.2 also continues
to build on previous versions' internationalization.
! * Enterprise-level network filesystem support, complete with data
! replication for performance, mobility, and reliability.
! * Video capture support, TV tuner support, enhanced audio support,
! and other multimedia capabilites.
! * Support for a large variety of SCSI and parallel port devices including disk
! drives, tape drives, and other easy-to-use external devices.
--- 23,36 ----
* A tradition of Y2K readiness positions Linux 2.2 as an international
! operating system ready for the new millennium, and Linux 2.2 continues
to build on previous versions' internationalization.
! * The network filesystem support is enterprise-grade, with data replication
! for performance, mobility, and reliability.
! * New multimedia capabilities include video capture support, TV tuner
! support, and enhanced audio support.
! * A large variety of new SCSI and parallel port devices are now supported,
! including disk drives, tape drives, and other easy-to-use external
! devices.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> Remarks about file-system compatibility need a context:
***************
*** 43,56 ****
! [* Compatibility with BSD and Windows NT filesystems enables Linux 2.2
! to seamlessly handle existing UNIX and NT data.
! The above * point may or may not be used. It certainly does remove the
! suggestion that there are heaps more NT servers than Linux ones. OTOH,
! people may be concerned that they'll lose a lot of time and data if they
! replace NT with Linux]
!
! * With compatibility for BSD and Windows NT filesystems, Linux 2.2 helps
! you leverage your existing UNIX and NT data today. SAMBA
! <http://www.samba.org> enables NT sharing from Linux. Linux 2.2 provides you
! with a strong upgrade path from your present Windows NT systems tomorrow.!
Linux 2.2 is available for free download on the Internet, and eager
--- 43,48 ----
! * Interoperability has been extended with the ability to read files on
! disks formatted for BSD, NT, and Macintosh systems, and to participate
! as an equal peer with other network file systems -- or replace them.
!
Linux 2.2 is available for free download on the Internet, and eager
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> We're already in Q1 1999, so mentioning Q1 1999 makes the announcment
> look dated. Saying "before Q2 1999" fixes this:
***************
*** 62,64 ****
Linux distribution vendors are expected to ship fully-integrated systems
! using the new kernel starting in Q1 1999. Business users should look
to their distribution vendors for information about this important
--- 63,65 ----
Linux distribution vendors are expected to ship fully-integrated systems
! using the new kernel before Q2 1999. Business users should look
to their distribution vendors for information about this important
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> Use of exclamation points is gratuitious. Is breathing new life
> into 386s the most exciting thing in the announcement? Far from it,
> in my view. If we start putting in exclamation points, where can we
> stop? Better to leave them out, or have a firm policy for where they
> really belong. (One such policy is to identify ironic or facetious
> remarks, which I don't think we are using here.)
***************
*** 72,74 ****
and UltraSPARC hardware. It can also breathe life into older machines--even
! 386- and 486-based computers! Networks of Linux computers can provide
supercomputer-like performance for some applications; one widely-known example
--- 73,75 ----
and UltraSPARC hardware. It can also breathe life into older machines--even
! 386- and 486-based computers. Networks of Linux computers can provide
supercomputer-like performance for some applications; one widely-known example
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> I don't think Linus started the project because of the poor quality of
> commercial Unices; as I recall he thought they were too expensive.
> "Poor value" encompasses both without impugning those (few?) of Linux's
> competitors that are actually of good quality, but just overpriced.
***************
*** 107,109 ****
proprietary, closed operating systems after becoming disillusioned with the
! poor quality of commercial offerings.
--- 108,110 ----
proprietary, closed operating systems after becoming disillusioned with the
! poor value of commercial offerings.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
> We really need a small glossary for such terms as SMP and WAN that are
> not staples of the trade press.
> Other comments: I don't see how Enlightenment merits a particular
> mention; there are lots of window managers under development.
> GNOME and KDE are applications, not kernel features. Mentioning
> them can only further confuse people about the role of an OS kernel.
Nathan Myers
ncm@cantrip.org
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